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Friday, November 22, 2019

Texans trying to declare their own Thanksgiving

Image result for texasSo my son and daughter-in-law moved to Dallas, Texas.  I am very proud of them and their decisions as they begin life together.  However, I am always inanely suspicious of Texas.

Recently, they tried to remove Hillary Clinton from their history curriculum as the first woman to lose a presidential election.

She wasn't actually.  That honor goes to Victoria Woodhull in 1872 promoting women's suffrage, spiritualism, and everyone's favorite... free love.  Truly, she was ahead of her time.  Literally, since she also didn't meet the minimum age for a presidential candidate.  But we digress.

Texans also have thoughts of removing Helen Keller.
Image result for texas stonehengePerhaps there is a joke in there but I don't see it.

These removals may make sense to some, but more disconcerting is what Texans have claimed to have!   They claim to have more tigers in Texas than exist in the wild.  They have a large cross obelisk surrounded by 13 images of Jesus and a cross in bronze.

Image result for texas leaning tower They claim to have an Eiffel tower, a Leaning Tower of Texas, an alien grave site,  a forbidden garden, Stonehenge, and a toilet seat museum.  OK, the last one is actually really awesome.  But you get my point.  Texans often claim to own things that just belong elsewhere.

And now I have learned they think they own Thanksgiving.,

According to the Texas Almanac, Texans believe they invented Thanksgiving.
Image result for texas first thanksgiving
We invented Thanksgiving!

the belief is that on April 30, 1598 (23 years earlier?) Spanish Explorer Juan de Onate commemorated a day of Thanksgiving in El Paso.

Apparently, he led thousands on a 50 day march across the Chihuahuan Desert before reaching the Rio Grande.  There two horses drank so much water their stomachs burst.  Two other horses were so thirsty they drowned themselves in the river.  Others settled for a much more low key celebration around a bonfire with some food (horse?) and drink.

I see several problems with this claim.  First, there is no Turkey.  Ok.... the Pilgrims didn't have any either but let's not get caught up in details.  No pilgrim hats.  That takes away the craft activities for thousands of elementary school kids across the country.  And somehow, I don't think politicians such as Hillary Clinton would approve of replacing pilgrim hats with exploding horse games.

But in that regard, I suppose in Texas, a state where there is an annual festival to watch and hopefully be consumed by bats,  it doesn't matter what Hillary thinks.

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